Maka kepala suku setempat berkata, “Kalo kamu semua masih mau hidup, kalian harus pergi ke hutan dan bawa kembali SEPULUH buah yang jenisnya sama. Tapi kalian hanya mendapatkan waktu tiga jam!”

Dengan sangat cepat ketiga pilot itu pun akhirnya lari ke hutan untuk mencari buah-buahan.

Setelah dua jam pilot pertama pun akhirnya datang membawa sepuluh buah apel.

Kepala Suku: “Baik kamu telah membawa 10 buah apel. Sekarang masukkan semua apel itu melalui lobang pantat kamu satu persatu. Kalau kamu merintih, atau membuat suara, kamu akan saya potong-potong jadi sate!!!”

Dengan perlahan-lahan sang pilot mencoba memasukkan apel pertama tanpa merintih. Dengan penuh perjuangan dan ketahanan akhirnya apel pertama bisa dia masukkan. Namun di apel yang ke dua ia tidak bisa menahan sakit dari unusnya, dan seraya merintih. Dengan kejam sang kepala suku memenggal kepala sang pilot. Maka naiklah ia ke surga.

Pilot kedua datang membawa 10 buah lengkeng. Dan kepala suku memeberikan instruksi yang sama kepada sang pilot. Dalam hati, “Yah kalo lengkeng sih gampang!”

Dan memang betul. Satu lengkeng masuk, dua lengkeng, tiga lengkeng… tapi pada saat ia memasukkan lengkeng yang ke sepuluh sang kepala suku tiba-tiba memotong kepalanya.

Saat pilot 2 naik ke surga ia bertemu dengan pilot 1.

Pilot 2: “Wah kamu mati juga ya?”

Pilot 1: “Iya aku bawa apel sih. Kan sakit! Ah, monyet tu kepala suku, syaratnya berat banget! Trus kamu bawa buah apa?”

Pilot 2: “Lengkeng.”

Pilot 1: “Lengkeng? Itu kan gampang, kecil, gak sakit lagi!”

Pilot 2: “Emang betul. Semua lengkeng hampir aku masukkan semua ke dalam lobang pantat. Tapi ya itu, tiba-tiba aku tertawa dan semua lengkeng yang aku sudah masukkan keluar semua…”

Pilot 1: “Bego kamu! Kok ketawa?”

Pilot 2: “Habis pas mau masukin lengkeng No. 10 aku liat Pilot 3 bawa DUREN!”

Pilot 1: “???”Similar Posts:

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Orang bodoh sering melakukan kesalahan,
maka dia rekrut orang pintar yang tidak pernah salah untuk memperbaiki yang salah.
Walhasil orang bodoh memerintahkan orang pintar untuk keperluan orang bodoh.

Orang pintar belajar untuk mendapatkan ijazah untuk selanjutnya mendapatkan kerja.
Orang bodoh berpikir secepatnya mendapatkan uang untuk membayari proposal yang diajukan orang pintar.

Orang bodoh tidak bisa membuat teks pidato,
maka disuruh orang pintar untuk membuatnya.

Orang bodoh kayaknya susah untuk lulus sekolah hukum (SH).
Oleh karena itu orang bodoh memerintahkan orang pintar untuk membuat undang-undangnya orang bodoh.

Orang bodoh biasanya jago cuap-cuap jual omongan, sementara itu orang pintar percaya.
Tapi selanjutnya orang pintar menyesal karena telah mempercayai orang bodoh.
Tapi toh saat itu orang bodoh sudah ada di atas.

Orang bodoh berpikir pendek untuk memutuskan sesuatu dipikirkan panjang-panjang oleh orang pintar,
walhasil orang orang pintar menjadi staffnya orang bodoh.

Saat bisnis orang bodoh mengalami kelesuan, dia PHK orang-orang pintar yang berkerja.
Tapi orang-orang pintar DEMO, Walhasil orang-orang pintar meratap-ratap” kepada orang bodoh agar tetap di berikan pekerjaan.

Tapi saat bisnis orang bodoh maju, orang pinter akan menghabiskan waktu untuk bekerja keras dengan hati senang,
sementara orang bodoh menghabiskan waktu untuk bersenang-senang dengan keluarganya.

Mata orang bodoh selalu mencari apa yang bisa dijadikan duit.
Mata orang pintar selalu mencari kolom lowongan perkerjaan.

Bill gate (Microsoft), Dell, Hendri (Ford),
Thomas Alfa Edison, Tommy Suharto, Liem Siu Liong (BCA group).

Adalah orang-orang Bodoh (tidak pernah dapat S1) yang kaya.
Ribuan orang-orang pintar bekerja untuk mereka.
Dan puluhan ribu jiwa keluarga orang pintar bergantung pada orang bodoh.

PERTANYAAN :
Jadi mending jadi orang pinter atau orang bodoh??
Pinteran mana antara orang pinter atau orang bodoh ???
Mulia mana antara orang pinter atau orang bodoh??
Susah mana antara orang pinter atau orang bodoh??

KESIMPULAN:
Jangan lama-lama jadi orang pinter,
lama-lama tidak sadar bahwa dirinya telah dibodohi oleh orang bodoh.

Jadilah orang bodoh yang pinter dari pada jadi orang pinter yang bodoh.

Kata kunci nya adalah “resiko” dan “berusaha”, karena orang
bodoh perpikir pendek maka dia bilang resikonya kecil,
selanjutnya dia berusaha agar resiko betul-betul kecil.

Orang pinter perpikir panjang maka dia bilang resikonya besar
untuk selanjutnya dia tidak akan berusaha mengambil resiko tersebut.
Dan mengabdi pada orang bodoh.Similar Posts:

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Friendship Between Men:
A man didn’t come home one night. The next day he told his wife that he
had slept over at a friend’s house. The woman called her husband’s 10
best friends. Eight of them confirmed that he had slept over, and two
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Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message:

“Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren’t yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don’t stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better.”Similar Posts:

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Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between John and the roommate than met the eye. Reading his mom’s thoughts, John volunteered, “I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Julie and I are just roommates.”

About a week later, Julie came to John and said, “Ever since your mother came to dinner, I’ve been unable to find the beautiful silver gravy ladle. You don’t suppose she took it, do you?” John said, “Well, I doubt it, but I’ll write her a letter just to be sure.”

So he sat down and wrote “Dear Mother, I’m not saying you did take a gravy ladle from my house, and I’m not saying you did not take a gravy ladle. But the fact remains that one has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.”

Several days later, John received a letter from his mother which read: “Dear Son, I’m not saying that you do sleep with Julie, and I’m not saying that you do not sleep with Julie. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by now. Love, Mom.”

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Dad says, “Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I’m the breadwinner of the family, so let’s call me capitalism. Your Mom, she’s the administrator of the money, so we’ll call her the Government. We’re here to take care of your needs, so we’ll call you the people. The nanny, we’ll consider her the Working Class. And your baby brother, we’ll call him the Future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense,”

So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has severely soiled his nappy. So the little boy goes to his parents’ room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny’s room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed. The next morning, the little boy says to his father, “Dad, I think I Understand the concept of politics now.” The father says, “Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about.” The little boy replies, “Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in deep ~I’m an idiot with no life~.”Similar Posts:

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Festivity Level One

Your guests are sitting around chatting, nibbling the party food, sipping their drinks. They are admiring your Christmas tree ornaments and stand around the piano singing carols.

Festivity Level Two

Your guests are talking loudly, occasionally to one another. They are wolfing down the food, gulping their drinks, rearranging your Christmas ornaments and sitting on the piano singing “I Gotta Be Me.”

Festivity Level Three

Your guests are holding conversations with inanimate objects, gulping other peoples’ drinks, wolfing down Christmas ornaments and dancing around the piano shouting the words to “I Can’t Get No Satisfaction”.

Festivity Level Four

Your guests, food smeared across their naked bodies, are capering around the burning Christmas tree in some unholy ritual. The piano is missing. Unless you rent your home, or own heavy firearms, you generally don’t want your parties operating above Level Three. The true test of party success, however, is whether or not the police arrive. If they do arrive, your job as host is to see that they don’t arrest anyone. If they are intent on arresting someone, your job is to see that it isn’t you. Following is an example of how to successfully handle this situation.

Police: “We’ve come in response to the complaints.”

You: “Complaints? It isn’t about the drugs, is it?”

Police: “No, sir, not drugs.”

You: “The guns, then? They’re complaining about the guns?”

Police: “No, sir. It’s about the noise.”

You: “Oh, that’s all right then. ‘Cause there sure aren’t any guns or drugs here, heh heh.”

[An explosion sounds somewhere behind you]

You: “Or fireworks either! The neighbors complained, did they?”

Police: “No, sir. The neighbors all fled inland hours ago. The recent complaints have come from Kansas.”

[At this point a Volkswagen Bug, painted in various arcane symbols, roars out of the living room, down the hall past you and the policemen, out into the front yard and into the nearest tree. Eight naked bodies tumble out, moaning.]

You: “There, you see? It’s winding down already.”Similar Posts:

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Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen. This is your captain speaking.
Welcoming both seated and standing passengers on board of L**n Air.
We apologize for the four-day delay in taking off, it was due to bad weather and some overtime I had to put in at the bakery.

This is flight 717 to Yogyakarta. Landing there is not guaranteed, but we will end up somewhere in Central Java .And, if luck is in our favor, we may even be landing on your village!

L**n Air has an excellent safety-record. In fact, our safety standards are so high, that even terrorists are afraid to fly with us!

It is with pleasure; I announce that, starting this year, over 30% of our passengers have reached their destination.

If our engines are too noisy for you, on passenger request, we can arrange to turn them off!

For our not-so-religious passengers, we are the only airline who can help you find out if there really is a God!

We regret to inform you, that today’s in-flight movie will not be shown as we forgot to record it from the television. However, for our movie buffs, we will be flying right next to G*****a Indonesia, where their movie will be visible from the right side of the cabin window.

There is no smoking allowed in this airplane. Any smoke you see in the cabin is only the early warning system on the engines telling us to slow down!

In order to catch important landmarks, we try to fly as close as possible for the best view. If however, we go a little too close, do let us know. Our enthusiastic co-pilot sometimes flies right through the landmark!

Kindly be seated, keep your seat in an upright position for take-off and fasten your seat-belt. For those of you who can’t find a seat-belt, kindly fasten your own belt to the arm of your seat. And, for those of you who can’t find a seat, do not hesitate to get in touch with a stewardess who will explain how to fasten yourself to your suitcase.”

Enjoy L**N AIR !!

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